Red Flags in a Relationship: 15 Things to Avoid


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Most people do not realize or notice the existence of red flags in a relationship until it ends. That is when someone gets a clear perspective of what transpired and where exactly things went wrong.

In most cases, the warning signs are misunderstood while being caught up in the passion of this new journey of romance, or as you get deeper into the relationship, you invested much effort and time to make it work. You tend to ignore the signs because you do not want to accept reality.

However, as you step into this new journey investigating contemporary romance and trying to know your significant other, it is important to always lookout for the red flags. Below is a list of fifteen red flags you should look out for in a relationship

15 Red Flags in a Relationship to Look Out for and Avoid

1) Lack of Communication

Communication is important in every relationship. It is especially important to have a mutual understanding when talking about critical issues in your relationship. When you talk about your plans, normal days, sexual desires, or even vacation desires, and your partner shuts down; you should take note. It’s possible that at the beginning of the relationship, sharing all your secrets can be a problem, but as you grow, you become open to each other. When your partner is not paying attention or doesn’t contribute to important aspects of your relationship, this is a red flag.

2) Family and Friends Disapprove

Listening to your family and friends sometimes helps you save yourself from a bad relationship because when they notice something off, they will tell you. Although this can be difficult for new relationships, sometimes all you need is an outsider’s perspective. It is therefore worth listening to your close family and friends most of the time.

3) Controlling Behavior

Some partners want to control who they talk to, where they go to, and such behavior is not good and needs to be looked out for. Such partners can limit you from meeting significant people in your life, such as family and friends.

4) Wanting Different Things

Having different viewpoints is usually what keeps a relationship interesting; however, both parties should share a shared vision when it comes to long-term goals. Nevertheless, when you find that you differ in your relationship’s most critical issues, you should take note because that proves to be a stumbling block to your happiness.

5) Unable to Be Your True Self

Long-term commitments require that you have someone who understands you inside out, and they are comfortable with that. However, if you notice that you are forced to pretend around your partner, this is a red flag that could end your relationship in the future.

6) Abusive Behavior

Abusive behavior is a red flag you should never ignore or excuse in a relationship. This includes all forms of abuse ranging from physical, verbal, or emotional abuse.

7) Lack of Trust

When your partner finds it challenging to trust themselves, it can be hard for them to trust their partners as well. You can notice this if your partner is constantly acting unaccountably for their actions. It is a sign that some things are hidden, and you cannot tolerate them.

8) Feeling Insecure

Sometimes, you might feel uncomfortable, anxious and do not know where the relationship is heading. Instead of being happy, all you do is work to keep your relationship on track. This is a sign that needs to be fixed or can result in future problems.

9) Dark Past

This involves past behaviors that can be suspected, addictive or illegal, and you have not already resolved in your relationship. They are red flags that need to be noticed.

10) A Relationship Built on the Need to Feel Needed

Suppose you are in a relationship where you feel comfortable only when you have done something to fit in it. The chances are that you might not experience any real growth, whether individual or as a couple. Move out immediately if you cannot resolve this problem.

11) Immature Partner

Some people enter into a relationship but have trouble mastering simple life skills such as taking care of themselves or making future life plans. It becomes hard to rely on such people for anything, which is a downside of a long-term relationship. Look out for such behavior.

12) Justifying Your Partner’s Behavior

If you find yourself obliged to justify your partner’s behavior even when it is wrong because maybe of something they went through in the past, this is a surefire red flag to look out for.

13) Not Talking Through Issues

This is a major red flag, and it is a signal that the relationship won’t work. Unwillingness to talk through any issues coming up in a relationship is not a good sign. All relationships have disagreements, but if you have someone with whom you can talk through issues, it becomes difficult to be comfortable in such a relationship.

14) Constantly Testing Your Boundaries

Some partners will constantly try to cross the boundaries you have set. This does not make a good relationship. Look out for such things as they can result in your relationship’s demise. Some, for instance, will force you to let them meet your family when you are not ready. It would help if you did not tolerate this.

15) Everything is About Them

If you notice that all your everyday life, conversations, life events, and interactions revolve around your partner, it means that there is the manipulation of power over you, and this is a red flag. In this scenario, things will only get worse with time.

Red Flags in a Relationship Summed Up

To sum up, a red flag will always act as a good discerning image to help you process what you are feeling for your relationship. Most people at the end of their relationship will keep saying that they were told this but never listened and that is because they ignored the red flags.

Try these 10 steps for boosting your self-esteem before charging into your next relationship.

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Jamie Wilkinson

Hey! My name is Jamie and welcome to Surviving the Day. I'm a jack of all trades but master of none. I love learning new things and living a healthy lifestyle. Hopefully, you'll find some of the information I share useful to you and your family. Feel free to drop me a line and I'll be sure to respond!

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